Keeping sane in the chaos of an international move

We’re moving countries. Not only that, we’re keeping 25 per cent of our life in Singapore, moving 75 per cent to Phuket, and the boys are getting ready to say goodbye and embark on a new school adventure.

For Lex, this is a happy process. He’s been in therapy all year and has no mates to play with. He’s missed friends and definitely wants some girls around him! We can’t wait for him to get started in the Arrowsmith Program.

Jax, on the other hand, has had an incredible period of stability at the Aussie School and he will soon be saying goodbye to his bestie. He’s not ready for the move yet, and while I know he’ll adjust and be happy, Steve and I are keeping a close eye on him to ensure he gets whatever attention he needs to adjust in the move.

And then there’s Steve and I. My last blog had the video of us chatting through what’s going on, but since then, we’ve been in the reality of it. There is A LOT to do. So many tiny details. So much shit collected and shoved away in cupboards to be sorted another day. School withdrawals and school applications. The animals. Oh the animals too. They need to be factored in. Thankfully it’s a pretty easy process getting animals into Thailand. Getting them back out, not so much….

But as I’ve said before, Steve and I do this sort of stuff differently. Very differently. And sometimes tempers get short. We back each other in everything, but nothing quite tests the boundaries of a marriage than an international move. It’s a shit and messy process. You miss stuff you promised to do. The other has to pick it up. We’re both jumping on planes to deliver work around the region (and world), something we’ll continue after we arrive in Phuket. Energy levels get low. The physicality of it all has an impact.

It’s intense. Tempers get caught in that mix.  

As an example, Jax’s homework didn’t get done these last two weeks. Bloody kid’s homework I tell you! Steve was away the whole time and I had evening commitments practically every night. How do we do this life, kids and work shuffle I often ask? It’s madness how much goes on in life under ordinary circumstances and we’ve added a whole new layer of shit to it. Oh yay.

So yes, tempers are going to fray. We’ll both have complete and utter meltdowns – hopefully not in public – but we will get there in the end. Slowly, step-by-step, painfully, things missed, picked up, things broken, tears shed.

I am visualizing what Phuket will look like after we arrive to get me through and I am very focused on Steve and I sitting by the pool, drinking a bottle of champagne on our first night together in Phuket. It feels a very very long way away right now…

I mean we don’t even have a home yet – in either location. So greetings from Phuket, as I go on a second hunt for the perfect family home. You’d presume this was easy, because you know, beach villas and all – but actually, it’s not. The fantasy and the reality are very different – as we discovered the last time we were here.

Our home is important to us and it has to be right. We can’t get lost in a monstrosity, because the boys still have night terrors, and unless we want them in with us every night, it’s got to be comfortable for them + convenient to the school + the shops + have a decent guest room + be comfy + have enough furniture but not too much so we can bring some of ours + a garden + a great pool + a fence to keep Freddy in +++++

So now I hunt and ask for positive vibes to come my way, plus patience, lots of patience, for Steve and for me.

Anyone else relate?

Yours, without the bollocks

Andrea

Particles of abstract fractal forms courtesy of Shutterstock

Thank you for reading my ramblings. My brain and heart are a work in progress, always. I’d love a comment if it stirred any thoughts or feelings and of course, please feel free to share it with anyone you know who might be interested or entertained. I sure do appreciate it when you do. If you want to connect, I'm on Twitter here, Google+ here, Instagram here, YouTube here, and Facebook too. I share loads of stuff, not just my own xxxxx